HIGH SCHOOL THROUGH COLLEGE

  🏳️‍🌈In my last two years of high-school and into my first trek through college is when I first discovered everything. It was also when I first started to hide everything because of my deeply religious family. As I said in my opening entry I decided it was safe or time to come out in 2019. But I had always questioned my sexual nature through high-school and my first run of college. During high-school years was when I had met Andrew a mutual friend of a best of mine.

 I always felt what I called at the time strange around him, I actually thought it was another seizure each time. Then I realized it was the same butterfly feeling I had when I was dating a girl or just hanging with one I wanted to date. Forcing myself to dismiss everything was very hard but because of what I was believing at time was the true Christian way I forced it and buried it.

 Throughout my first term in college I had a steady girl friend so she in a way helped the feelings stay buried.  It probably was never a good thing but it did happen. I remember feeling strongly towards one of my guy class mates, who was bisexual but for me to approach him was still a difficult thing. 

 Then I was outright approached not by that class mate but another school student. I had all the great feeling but at same time still had the religious fear in me so as much as I would have liked to I said no. 

 Finally during my Dunham college days a number of years ago I met somebody and he is a great guy. Unfortunately we never did get the chance to date at all. However he and another friend of his made me feel at ease about my feelings. 

 Eventhough I still dated girls in Durham College I did have a few casual dates with one of the guys. That was a true awakening in a way for me. The awakening did take well over ten years but I was finally able to come out to my friends and family.🌈  💛🤍💜🖤