Newlytravels

The first link in the chain I'm going to mention was the first person to give me encouragement. That person is my ex teacher Tom Gallagher I remember talking with him and saying how I couldn't come out because of my sister and my parents. He told me I needed to give them credit.  So I told them admitily at first Ike a long while they mentioned how they supported but often didn't. I think my niece and my moms friend really turned them around as things are so different.   The next two links I am going to mention are my camp friend Aubyn and her son Taegyn. Although I had never met her son I saw his bravery and that was something that really encouraged me. It even lifted some weight off my shoulders.   Another link is my friend Jennifer as she is a very supportive person. When I was upset there were times I could talk with her and she knew just what to say. Always a very understanding person and was thankful for that.   My friend Eileen she also encourage...

 With more and more time being spent inside alone, well not totally alone. I still have the communication with my friends either on the phone or through Facebook or Twitter. So I have come to see more and more the Bi/demisexual/biromantic combination in me. At first I thought it was because I was missing people and the world like seeing all my friend's and maybe probably not but maybe having a chance at a date.  I'm realizing I don't need just dates anymore as fun as they were in the past. And as fun as sex was of course I'm getting new emotions run through me when it comes to both guys and girls I think about.  I could just sit all night either holding hands cuddle position. Maybe kissing a bit. Or if if came down to it and the total connection was there could see more happening. But that would need to be explored. And because of the situation everyone is in that won't be for a while. I know not many understand this way of romance or life but as I called it before ...

 🏳️‍🌈 I recently have been having some very deep conversations with a few of the people I used to date and remained friends with. The conversations I must say were very very enlightening to me a large eye opener. Until the conversations it wasn't really something I had thought about. As most of you know when I came out I came out as gay and most people as I've mentioned weren't surprised some even asked why I hadn't come out sooner. I of course explained the timing and the hard decisions I thought buy I was wrong faced me.   Then as those of you who know about the top part I just wrote you know about the conversations I came out as bisexual and it seemed to be much more who I was. Then I started reading stuff from a good friend of mine and this was more of an eye opener for me.   It was falling into the Asexual umbrella I say umbrella because with the way I've bern in every relationship especially my last I couldn't be pure Ace. So I did a ton of reading over ...

 🏳️‍🌈 I kind of touched on this in my last entry so this entry going too give it the full detail. As I said in my last entry I always thought dating maybe even getting married was the normal everyday thing. That's because it was being engrained into my mind. Although it wasn't talked about a ton or daily I knew and everybody else knew that was kind of how my parents were. Or so it seemed becsuse of my sister as she followed the same way.  Plus going all through school especially the high-school years I felt we were taught about the white Pickett fence. Of course this is when I first started to wrestle with different feelings and because was a catholic high-school and in later 80s very early 90s coming out was happening. It probably as I remember was just getting fully accepted around that time.  So with all of that I at times would be nervous about chatting.  Now of course I have mentioned that I was attracted to both sexes and it was equal or very close to equal. ...

 🌈I fully understand why I came out as fully gay now. This came from of course help of friends very close friends who talked with me. The lack of family coming to me even after I came out as "gay".it was more of cool or a very blase reaction until for them it's a big deal. It was kind of shock I must admit ok didn't matter you were happy until everything embarrassed you. So why exactly did I come out as fully gay and not bisexual as I did ages ago. Also after 14 months of research thank you covid by the way combined with Asexual as I mentioned last night.   Ok I've been with a few girlfriends some definitely much better than others. Also one long term bf and other dates. With every girlfriend with the exception of one they were very very sexual I think my best gf was the one where was able to be with love wise cuddle hold hands.   The solid bf I had could be the same but not quite as gentle at times. Anytime I had been out with a guy they have wanted more....

   I have two sides two my record even more and more the longer covid goes on. I haven't been with anyone since the start of covid as a matter of fact haven't thought of dating. Thought of different situations if it could happen. But not actually dating. I've lost well maybe not lost but it has been really low in my mind.  I haven't been thinking about sex or an actual sexual partner. However I have been looking at nips hugging holding hands cuddle time with people. The longer I have been trapped so to speak the more I feel the ASEXUAL Demi side the "introvert" side so to speak as well as my Bisexual side the "extrovert". I've learned a more romantic side in things. Especially talking to people there a connection coming through because I'm learning how to use the introvert side with my extrovert. 

  🌈 I will actually start off with Christians to start this entry. So many Christian people put themselves on a huge high pedestal, especially when it comes to talking about LGBTQ community. They seem too place themselves above the LGBTQ community thinking in everyday that they are superior and better. This is actually something that I experienced from a few friends first hand, it was rather a shocking experience. It's something that really throws you for a loop.  Because so many of Christians see what they believe has to be correct gay, trans, bi, pan and the rest of the LGBTQ community don't have a place. It's very frustrating for some in the gay community as they want to go to church and feel as welcome as anybody. However not all but many put a barrier up.  Now I'm going to refer to children from something that appeared on Facebook.   In the states somebody had a VW car painted in pride colors and there house painted the same, of course flying the flag. The...

  🏳️‍🌈 Promise: This word definitely applies to me when it comes to the word pride. Many years ago even before I started coming out to everyone I had made a double sided inner Promise to myself. Either I was going to come out to everyone or I was going toivr my life as a bisexual. However not using the actual term I'll explain  I was going to live my life as hey your attractive weather it was a guy or girl. I know basically the exact same thing I and most people feel comfortable with "labels" so after coming out gay I came out not long after bisexual. As most I know are comfortable with label. I have to admit I feel free and comfortable with saying it.  Reason: So why Reason ok here is a very simple explanation. I've had over the years before coming out, woman say to me how handsome I was/am. It was very flattering won't deny. So I would have them ask me why on earth I would come out. There were a few I asked why are you still straight. It was like when I first ...

 🏳️‍🌈So exactly how does a house feel like a dystopian book you may be asking? Well ok look at all of recent dystopian books and the world's they are written in. Take the Hunger games where they are fighting each other for everything. Or look at The Handmaids Tale where the main character is one who just won't be broken of who she truly is no matter what. My favorite example is 1984 where everybody has no privacy and has to conform like in most dystopian stories but it takes it a bit further in some points.   For much of my life I have felt like I have been living in a dystopian home much of it had to do with my disabilities I live with. A couple of years ago it felt like the house became a bit more dystopian where I was getting stripped down even more. Much like what happened in 1984 and the Handmaids Tale. Then trying to escape like in the hunger games.  Now I haven't been trying to escape the house itself just at times the power inside. It became even harder whe...

 🏳️‍🌈 I'm going to be entering and talking about many people in this entry. They won't be in any Paticular order as many people were instrumental and guides for me. So here we go with a few people. Now before I get to deeply into this entry, yes I have partly talked about certain people who I will mentioning but I thought pride was a perfect place to revisit. Now as I said I'm going a bit out of order.  So now I'll start with the first person who comes to mind. The first person who always pops into my mind when the topic of my coming out or LGBTQ in general is my former teacher Tom Gallagher. The reason I have him pop into my head first is he was a teacher when I was in high-school and I can't even imagine his struggles as a teacher. He was and still is an amazing and strong person for everything through the years.  The next person I'm going to mention is somebody from my college day's. He was somebody everyone avoided kind of put him off to side, it had n...

 🏳️‍🌈 Today started pride month 2021 and in many ways it is an awesome pride month. Yes very true there's not going to be any live in person events no huge parade downtown again but there will be lots of online events. As a matter of fact I've signed up for a few online events already and am looking forward to them. Last year I attended a few and they were pretty good.   The best part of last year was a few of my friends and I had our own pride zoom party. I hope we can do that again this year, that would be awesome plus I know it's not in person but we get to see each other and we get to talk about everything we love or at least talk about pride. We are all adjusting to the new way of life hopefully we can get back to what we were all used to in the past. Happy pride month to all my awesome pride friends that have been with me since the brgining of my journey. Also a happy pride month to all of my friend's who are showing me support all of you are amazing. You truly ...