Newlytravels

  I have been thinking about this for quite a while now. It all has to do with me being a non binary person. When I first came out as non binary it was awesome and amazing it was such a lovely feeling. Then suddenly I was getting attacked and it was stomach turning for me. Nights where I would just stay up feeling stressed.  The worst part was that nobody in my family would accept me as Quinn. Everyday I'm hearing on purpose my birthname only person I can accept is my father because of everything he has gone through. But my mother my sister brother in law or any of there kids still use my birth name.  Having people outside the family is just as bad for being a non binary person and it can be mental meltdown sometimes. Especially when people purposely refuse to use my pronouns and purposely call me sir he him.

  Yes I was AMAB at birth but since coming out freeing myself as a Nonbinary individual and becoming Quinn. I have more and more I was feeling my feminine feelings and showing it to different people.   Now yes I still have my masculine side to me. That side is especially at home or when I see other family friends. Another time I notice this is yes certain parts of my birth self obviously is still there and I'm not totally  comfortable using it but I can. It's mostly for my dad.   Another part of my feminine self is at times when I'm out in public I've begun to notice it more. This many many times is just my mannerisms that I show.  Other times I will all out show my fem side in public by getting pictures taken and pictures at my EX GF house and escaping into my prefered life. Using my own pronouns chosen name when I can. I don't think there is any one way to do things right. No one line everyone has to or should follow. 

  Tonight I was approached with a similar question from another friend. I was asked about my recent picture in my Quinn album where I have a skirt on showing my more feminine side of Quinn. I was asked if I was or thinking of transitioning fully female? As I have mentioned no I wouldn't transition not now however I think I mentioned there was a time that I would have.   I had always felt a large feminine side to myself and I always wondered what I would have looked like in girlfriends clothing and my friends who are ladies. Where did I first start this feeling? It was actually split between the end of high-school and one trip I took to Nova Scotia with family. One day I was in jeans a t shirt and a button shirt. That day I really felt half half massculine and feminine in my wear. After this things kinda of both snowballed and stalled, I'll explain that.  I started thinking look how amazing she look and I know I could look the same. Then in high-school because of cath...

  This blog is going out to a very special CIS person in my life. Somebody who has been in my life for a long time and has been there through many good and bad times in my life for sure. The person I'm talking about is a person I had a relationship with in the past and it did have its ups and downs but this person never failed in the end to be there.  I am talking about my former girlfriend Jennifer and yes even with the turmoil we faced I have to be honest I don't know where I would be today with her. As a matter of fact as I've mentioned before she was indirectly the reason I truly found Quinn and was able to come out to my parent's. Along with the help of some other friends.  Right now we are in a great place with each other.  Able to cuddle hold hands small kisses but not take things to far. I find that where we are compliments each other. It's a see what happens game not a rush game for sure. Who knows we may just be awesome buddies and I'd be happy as long...