MY NON BINARY TRANSGENDER SELF HOW MY FAMILY EFFECTED IT

  This for me is definitely going to a very interesting post and one that has been a very long time coming as well. It's all about my family and how they both kept it from coming and also brought it right into the spotlight. First off as I had mentioned before I was afraid for to long to even talk about anything LGBTQ with my family in a deep way, then there was the side of just coming out. It was a very nail hitting experience for sure one I still play over in my mind at times. 

 So how was I supposed to tell my family about these feelings I had for years upon years about having my fem side and wanting to explore it. Then after I had explored it what was I to say if I felt comfortable in this new me or as I have come to see it true me. 

 Another reason my family effected this side of it is because of my disabilities and health I had never been treated like a "full man" I always in a way felt more delicate like the daughter would. Over the years I imagined that was what I was meant to be and really started to feel comfortable thinking I could be either the tane son or the daughter figure.

 Then as I had mentioned before when I was in highschool I was seeing how some girls dressed on casual days and thinking I could really feel comfortable like that. So just to try things out a couple of times during my highschool years for a costume party I did dress fem and I felt a freedom. A release almost. 

 Then of course the rest of the time definitely around family everything was and still is masculine wear.

 The next time I felt the same freedom was at my heart camp when I dressed up as Dr. Frankenfurter from Rocky Horror. Everybody loved the costume that was a great weekend and feeling

  I think one of my if not definitely my biggest help was my GF Jennifer over the years. Yes it was true it has been a long journey but a journey worth it. Especially with where I am in my journey now. When I was with Jennifer each time especially now I felt a strong fem side at times and admired certain outfits both of hers and that I would see when we were out. So I knew I had to talk about my non binary feelings and I did. It really helped me see and feel the real me. My non binary trans life has been so much of a satisfaction because I'm living it for me. These last few years have been my best ever of my 52.🌈